Friday, July 2, 2010

"Girl, Don't Let Your Dreams Be Dreams!"

For as long as I can remember I’ve had a desire to explore and to know.  I’ve always been known as the person who asks too many questions in class or cares too much about random details.   I love to travel, I love to explore and investigate cultures and places that are different from my own.   I want to see every corner of the world I possibly can.  I want to know what life is like for people living in the Alaskan Igloos (do people actually still live in igloos?), for people in India, South Africa, Israel, and New Zealand.  How is what the people in Israel value different from what we value?  How is it similar?  What do educators in New Zealand do differently from American educators?  What do they do that is the same?  What results are they seeing in their school systems that we are not seeing?    What are the people in South Africa passionate about and how do they interact with one another?  Are the people in New Zealand as materialistic as Americans?  Do the people in Australia rush through life the way we do?   What are relationships like for people in other places around the world?

My curiosity isn’t just for the cultures of other countries.  It’s for the culture of Americans all across the country, past and present.  I want to know what it’s like to wake up in the middle of Yellowstone Park, to go caving in the Carlsbad Caverns, to sit at the Grand Canyon, talk to God and learn about the Native Americans who ruled these lands so many years ago.  I want to explore places like the Badlands and learn about the events, ceremonies and rituals that took place there hundreds of years ago.  I want to experience big cities like, Chicago, Salt Lake City, Las Vegas and Los Angeles and I want to go to lesser known places like, Billings, Montana (Hey, Kathleen!) and Alamogordo, New Mexico.   
I have this incredible desire to experience as much of the world as possible.  I know the responsible thing to do is to get a “real job” after college or at least to go to grad school (and believe me I really want to do both!) but I can’t help but think, when else will I have this opportunity and how amazing would it be if I could have first hand experiences in 16+ national parks, 30+ cities, and 21 states?  What if I had my very own experiences, photographs, souvenirs and stories from all of these places to share with my students?  What if I had the opportunity to make the learning come to life for them?

Is it possible that I could experience different cultures from around our country and world and then bring back that knowledge for my students, friends and family in a way that creates a bridge between our cultures, a bridge that could break down barriers, prejudice and mistaken beliefs?
About a month and a half ago I realized that the reason I never follow through with planning any of my big fantasy trips is because I never have the money and never know when I will have it.  When I realized this I thought the only way to stop this cycle is to come up with a plan to get the money.  How can I expect to someday have the money if I don’t come up with a plan to save the money?  So I wrote out exactly what it was that I wanted to do and then I figured out how much it would cost.  I then picked a tentative date and figured out how much I would need to save each week if I was going to leave by that date.  Then I found some extra jobs all within a week and got to work at meeting my weekly savings goal.  But then a lot of people started giving me their 2 cents (which I appreciate greatly).  Some people said I should go to other places on my road trip, some people didn’t want me to do both things, some didn’t think I should do any of it, some thought I should take more time on my road trip, some said I should line up a job in New Zealand and stay longer, some said I should wait another year and then go, some said I said I shouldn’t go on the road trip and I should use that time and money in New Zealand. With all of these suggestions I started trying to mold my plans and dream to fit their thoughts and opinions but it got quite exhausting and every time I tried to make a change to the plan I would get upset because it felt like I was settling, like I wasn’t following my dream and I would ask myself, why am I doing this if I am not going to do it my way? 

Then out of the blue one afternoon my dad said to me “Don’t lose your dream.” And I realized that I needed to stop trying to fit my dream into everyone else’s plans (as well intentioned as they were) and let it be my dream and my plan. 

So, ladies and gentlemen, I am taking some advice from a Jack Johnson song (“Girl, don’t let your dreams be dreams.”) and going all out with my plans.  This September I will be getting in the car and driving 6,900 miles, stopping in 30 cities, 16 national parks, visiting 8+ old friends and 6+ friends of friends (Thank you to all of you who have offered me a couch along the way, I already have about half of the nights covered).  I will then return home for about a month and a half before heading to New Zealand and then Australia (why not, it’s only another $100 on the plane ticket?).   

An Evening in Charleston

At the Battery in Downtown Charleston
This was in my journal from March 26th, 2010....  

"I've always envied those people, women in particular, who just seem to be able to do anything independently. Not the ones who have to because they are loners or social outcasts but the ones who seem so secure with themselves that they have no problem going away alone and actually enjoy it. I've always wanted to be able to do it but would not because I didn't know what I would do with myself or whether it was safe.

I'm laying in bed, in a cabin, at a campground and I am alone and it is fun. I'm getting up in six hours to run a 10K across a bridge with 40,000 other people and I will be all by myself. I'm looking forward to meeting new people and having a great time. But am I crazy? Normal people don't do things like this... Will it be all I've cracked it up to be? Who knows, but I'm proud of myself and thankful to God for an amazing life and such wonderful opportunities."

Here's the point... I ran the race and it WAS a blast!  At the end of the race I arrived in a park in downtown Charleston.  These two girls asked me to take their picture and then invited me out for drinks (Hey, it's Charleston and we were on King St. what did you expect?)... It didn't stop there.  Then they invited me to a Citadel vs. App State baseball game (where I got to see App get beat, which never happens in Cullowhee). 

I did it... I am the girl who can do anything by myself just because I felt like it.  I can go on vacation to another city, run a race, go out for drinks with strangers (ok, that sounds way worse than it was), make new friends, sit on the beach alone and revel in God's beauty.
"Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet."
Me with my new friends at the baseball game.

Friday, May 21, 2010

What Story Do You Want To Write?

Today Jodi told me a story that she read last night in Donald Miller's book A Million Miles. It is a long story and not one I can tell here since I didn't read the book (yet) but basically it's about this father/husband who realizes he isn't doing a very good job when it comes to "writing" his family's story. He decides to step up and lead his family in telling a new story. His family's story becomes one of a family that raises $25,000 to start an orphanage in Mexico.

From my conversation with Jodi, I got the message that Miller is encouraging each of us to stop allowing the world and life to dictate the story we are telling and to pick up the pen, take control (under God's leadership) and decide for ourselves what the story is going to be.

As a recent college graduate (2 weeks), I can feel the pressure to choose a path, to decide what story my life is going to tell. I was just accepted today into an amazing graduate program (my first and only choice)in a city I absolutely love, I live in a beautiful, little mountain town surrounded by amazing, beautiful people who love me and I have an AMAZING job but I also have the opportunity to do ABSOLUTELY anything at this point in my life and I feel like if I go to Charleston right away or if I stay here in Bryson I am playing it safe and I don't want to do that. I want to live my life. I want to trust that God will take care of me. I want to experience His best for me.

I could just go to Grad School because that is the responsible thing to do and I "should just get it over with" but why do I have to be so responsible? When will I ever get to just LIVE? There is a quote in my room that I have had framed for years and it says, "Live all the days of your life." There is also a magnet on my fridge that reads, "Do one thing every day that scares you." The thing is I do not want to sit on the sidelines as MY life story is written by the world, I do not want to allow fear to have control over my life and I don't want to miss out on God's bigger story because I was afraid to step out on a different path than everyone else. I want to discover the life God has planned for EACH and EVERY one of my days and I want to see what happens when I take the pen back from the world and give it to God.

What will happen when I let God write the story of my life? I don't know the answer to that but I can tell from past experiences that it will be absolutely, mind blowingly, amazing!!